What doesn’t kill you makes you STRONGER.

This mantra is something I’ve always held on to when times get tough. I’d like to dedicate this post, in honor of breast cancer awareness month, to my momma, and tell you a little bit about her, and how she shaped me into the woman I am today.

The date was August 2014. James and I were sitting on the couch watching tv. There weren’t many other activities I wanted to partake in while being 8 months pregnant. My cell phone rang and it was my mom, which was not unusual since we talk at least a couple of times a week. But the one thing I did know, because she is a horrible liar and her voice tells all, was that something was wrong. Very wrong. The news, which hit me like a Mack truck crashing into every bone in my giant pregnant body, was devastating. My mom had cancer. Breast cancer. What?! No one in our family has had breast cancer, so it came as quite a shock. It was nearly impossible to digest. While I held it together on the phone, asking her all the hows, whens, and whats, as soon as the call was over, I broke down, collapsing into the arms of my husband. Fortunately, James had already talked to my parents and knew what was coming. I couldn’t even begin to believe what I had just heard.

Just a few weeks later my mom underwent her first surgery, the first step on her journey to fighting back against cancer. And just a couple of weeks later, her first grandchild was born. Never in my life have I experience such a dynamic shift in emotions, so I cannot even fathom the roller coaster my mom was on. Her trek continued when she underwent another surgery, followed by 6 chemo treatments, and 32 radiation treatments, bringing her treatment course to nearly a full year. There were ups and downs with some mountains and trenches along the way, but my mom never gave up. I remember talking to her often and while she was generally in good spirits the day before chemo, she was a mess the days following, her body battling to keep up with the chemo she had just received.

While I cannot even begin to tell you the depths of her story, or the highs and lows she went through physically, emotionally, and spiritually, I can tell you this: my momma is a ROCKSTAR. Three years later and she remains cancer free! Reflective of her positive spirit in life, she never once complains about anything or anyone (well sometimes about my dad…lol). She has ALWAYS been there and continues to be there for me and my bros – I only wish that I can be half the mom she is. She epitomizes the term hard worker. She has worked her butt off for everything that she has, earning every piece of it. One of my fondest memories growing up as a young woman was going into my mom’s office at work. It oozed dedication, confidence and joy — all of which I think she instilled in my own work ethic. She is selfless. I mean the lady was handed a cancer diagnosis and she was more worried about telling me because she didn’t want it to affect the pregnancy or baby. She never ceases to amaze me.

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Twinning.

Often times we coin cancer survivors as “fighters”. Well, for my mom, it wasn’t in August 2014 when she started fighting. She has always been a fighter. She did not let her cancer diagnosis define her. Instead, she redefined cancer. She’s a warrior. For me, for my brothers and my dad, her grandkids, her family, her friends, her church, and anyone else she has a relationship with in her life. She will continue to fight because that’s who she is. She doesn’t give up on anyone. You can only be so lucky to have her as a part of your life. I know I am, and I thank God for her everyday. Despite this journey being one of the most difficult things in my life, I am so grateful for my mom, and for the lessons she has taught me throughout this journey and life. Remember, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I love you Momma/GiGi!

psx_20181009_2211402125109202410743143.jpgFor those of you reading this who are cancer warriors, or have your own warriors in your life, I praise you and envy your strength and tenacity. You are awesome.

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One thought on “What doesn’t kill you makes you STRONGER.

  1. What a beautiful tribute….Thank you sweet Ashley❤️ I don’t know that I qualify for rock star status but I’m certain that I am truly Blessed to have the family and friends that I do! The support and many acts of kindness are what gave me strength during treatment and when I was empty the Lord picked me up and carried me. I will never forget that on the day I lost my hair that my husband and my son in law (Ashley’s hubby) shaved their heads or that my daughter in law and youngest son sat with me at chemo when my husband couldn’t, the endless calls and cards, and the flowers from my children on the last day of chemo. There was an army battling cancer with me and I am honored to know and love all of them.

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